April is half over. I feel lost. Yesterday I told my best friend that I feel like I am failing at everything. Am I trying to do too many things?
The most important thing to me right now is taking good care of Roscoe. Second, is feeling like I am doing well with my photography. This goes hand in hand with taking care of Roscoe since it’s how I make my living. Afterwards come wanting to be a good partner to Edie, self care, and maintaining my art practice. Only 5 things! Why can’t I do 5 things?!
Last month we went to Dallas with Edie’s family for a funeral. Roscoe did well on the drives, and I existed in a half conscious state, blissed out, probably slept more during the drives to and from Dallas than I have in months. Once we got back, Roscoe started sleeping through the night some days.
Looking back on the spring so far, we definitely spend a lot of time outside. We take lots of pictures. Stop to look at flowers. Roscoe eats solid food now, so we are planning our meals and also her meals. I know I am really doing a lot, but I feel disorganized, unfocused. Tomorrow we will clean. It’s crazy how much the need to clean can sort of take over my life sometimes.